The Blind Trust Experiment

In June of 2018 I quit my non-stop travel and moved to ’s-Hertogenbosch. I decided to create little adventures aiming to make a difference, to get outside my comfort zone and to get to know my new city and its people. I started with a 'FREE HUGS'-sign to share love and be kind to my new neighbours. What I wasn’t prepared for was the reaction from an older woman: “My husband recently passed away, I don’t get to hug that often anymore. Do you have any idea what your offer means to me?” Holy cow, I didn’t see that coming! When I had a similar experience the week after, I decided to made it a weekly activity, until I would get the feeling that it wasn't needed anymore. For over a year now, every single week (without exception), there is someone that tells me: “I am so glad you’re here. I really need a hug.” A lady told me two weeks ago that she hadn't had a proper hug in six(!) years. Thanks to this activity I’ve met so many wonderful people. There is now a whole group of people who regularly join me hugging. Bartenders and shop owners keep offering me things and I even found myself in local, regional and national newspapers. It is amazing how many doors may open when you open yourself up to the world.

Offering hugs to strangers started way outside of my comfort zone, but now I’m very comfortable doing it, especially in ’s-Hertogenbosch. I know exactly what to expect. So how can I get uncomfortable again, to keep growing, while simultaneously attempting to make the world a better place?

Inspired by the Liberators, I decided to participate in a Blind Trust Experiment. I would stil be hugging with strangers, but this time blindfolded. To make it even more challenging I would be going to a different city. Alone. Besides me being uncomfortable, the greater message in this activity is an invitation to trust each other more. We are all human beings trying to do the best we can. And there are so many beautiful souls out there. It’s unfortunate that good people and good actions rarely make the news, which skews our world view.  

One Day or Day One, you decide.. 

As I’m telling my friends and family about this plan I feel a soft panic rising. Good! I’m getting nervous! 'One day' turns into 'tomorrow' as I’m texting a couple of friends and family members to let them know it is happening. No way back! All I need is a blindfold and a piece of cardboard with the text: 'I trust you. Do you trust me? Give me a hug! 🙂 ' I smile when I realise that the most amazing experiences don’t have to cost much. All you need is a cardboard, a sharpie and some guts.

It is happening! 

I make my way to the train station to catch a train to Amsterdam. I’m heading to Dam Square: one of the busiest squares in the city. I notice a fine line between nervousness and excitement as I’m having a dialogue on my head. Why did I have to do this again? Come on Thijs, you know beautiful things are bound to happen! 

There are already a lot of people on the square when I start to unfold my cardboard and put it in position. I blindfold myself and open my arms. I'm surrendering to whatever (or whoever) comes my way. I notice that my heart starts pounding in my chest. I have no clue who or what is around me and I’m in a physically vulnerable position. I try to calm myself down with breathing exercises and try to enjoy the warm sunshine on my face. 

After about a minute or so I hear someone park a bike nearby and footsteps are approaching me. “I trust you brother”, a man says, and he gives me a big hug. Wow, that was interesting! Instantaneously, my nerves calm down and I’m relaxed.

Many people follow the man: men, women, children, elderly people. I didn’t keep track of how many hugs I received, but if I'd have to guess it would easily be north of a hundred. I have no clue who I’m hugging, what people look like or where they are from. Some folks give me hints: “I’m from Canada, we’re visiting for a week!” “Hey man, we’re from Colombia, this is such a nice thing to do”, “Hi! I’m from Hong Kong!” And the list goes on. I get a lot of positive feedback about this activity. “This is so awesome that you are doing this, it is much needed!” and “I love you, you’re a beautiful soul.”

When I take off my blindfold for a second to get some water, I notice that some people have left some change next to my sign, ha! Bystanders have formed a small crowd and I see many loving eyes looking my way. I quickly blindfold myself again and spread my arms as wide as I can. 

What impresses me most is how gentle and soft people approach me to start a hug, ensuring to not scare me. What is also interesting is that I feel like everybody is giving me hugs, opposed to me offering or sharing hugs (like I experience it when walking around with a 'FREE HUGS'-sign). I indulge in every hug and I thank people for their trust and their hug. I feel so much love flowing.

After standing on the square for about two and a half hours, I pack up my stuff and make my way back home, to be on time for work. What a wonderful experience. On just a regular Tuesday.